the bespectacled duo
A SMALL OBSCURE PUBLICATION    &nbspTwo young women were apprehended this morning for attempting to commandeer a large king-size mattress from a semi-truck which was unloading a crate of them outside a nearby hotel.

They ran across the courtyard shouting gibberish like SUSHIIIIIIIII!! and JAAAAAAAAKE! and threatening to steal cars with a suspected felon they addressed as Marc. (That's just the kinda thing you did with Marc.)

They proceeded to a small mini-mart and were spotted for attempted shoplifting of laserdiscs. Unfortunately what they did not realise is that laserdiscs are not foldable nor can they fit inconscpicuously in one's back pocket.

Conspiratorily munching on a Skor bar and a York peppermint patty, respectively, they returned to their hide-out encumbered with the aforementioned mattress. To complete the epic saga of their journey, they dragged their loot upstairs to a well-respected *cough* office building and sang "For Emily, Whenever I May Find Her", a song later identified to be of the Simon and Garfunkel species.

What the events of this morning foretell or forbid is not yet known.